Clothing Fatwa

This topic has come up before but as evidenced by the title of this post it’s a whole lot worse now. The photo below is my much beloved, 10 year old grey knit shorts. I’ve just been informed by J that said shorts are “hideously unflattering” to which I replied, “And your point is?” This is not news. I didn’t buy these shorts to look hot, I bought them because they’re a pair of sweats, but for summertime. Yes, the elastic is shot and they have bleach stains and the waistband is fraying but the drawstring works so they don’t fall down and they mean I don’t answer the door to the UPS guy in my underwear.

So, my dear husband has determined that not only does he hate these shorts but that they must be eradicated. I find his sudden sartorial delicacy interesting as this is a man who wears his 22-year-old Birkenstocks OUT. IN. PUBLIC. First of all, if I had known about these ‘shoes’ before we got married it would never have happened. Game over. So, getting all uppity because you think my short are ugly does not work. Especially as this is the pair he wanted to buy to replace them. I’m flattered that he still thinks I could or would wear something like this but I’m pretty sure 50-year-old hooker is not a good look.

Until I can find another pair of comfy knit shorts (or these disintegrate) I’m going to keep wearing these…and hiding them at night.


  1. Haha! I have a beloved Ralph Lauren button down men's shirt that I love beyond reason! I wear it as my summer robe....frayed and soft as butter, I won't give it up either :). Stand strong against those who would rob you of your bliss. So happy to know I'm not alone in my shabbiness!

  2. This made my morning, as I too, have the comfy pants which shockingly embarrass my husband. Whuuut? But they aren't going anywhere. Never surrender!

  3. Those denim hotpants don't look comfortable at all - what's he thinking? Though I think you could wear them and look good but why would you??

    I have some threadbare cotton capris that have paint and bleach on them that I will never give up.

    Keep up the good fight!!

  4. Thank you ladies! I'm glad to know you all have your own favorites. Rebecca, I had a RL shirt that I wore until the sleeve detached from the shoulder. It was so soft. The shorts will stay until their cloth molecules disintegrate.


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