Killing Time

That title is a bit more aggressive than necessary. It also connotes enough sloth to appear unflattering. So, what I mean is RESEARCH. This is what I do to help me produce more amusing, relevant, charming, controversial, and hopefully some day, lucrative posts. Hhhmmmm…..I just accidentally scrolled down and saw my post on Noodle Café and am now convinced I’ll die if I don’t get some spicy seafood stew and fried rice noodle rolls. Damn it!

OK, husband said no way in hell are we driving to Newport for food so where was I? Ah, doing research. When the creative well runs dry I turn to people from whom it feels as if being creative is like converting oxygen to carbon dioxide- completely natural and without effort. Rationally I know this is not true and the creative process is an onerous one for anyone (who said 90% of it is just planting your ass in a chair?). Here are two places I go, sometimes for hours, when I need inspiration.

Hyperbole and a Half

Allie has recently moved to Bend, OR from Montana and she is one more of the ‘cool’ quirky people who reside in this state as opposed to those who are men trying to be women but are still men but are having babies kind of quirky. When I read the post below it was one of those laugh until you cry moments which are few and far between the older you get. Now that I follow her blog I’m pretty sure we would be best friends if we ever met. Or if I showed up on her doorstep to say hi and welcome to Oregon. Have I mentioned that I’m a bit lonely now that I don’t even have work friends to hang around with?

God of Cake

Anyway this is one twisted chick and I mean that as the highest compliment possible. Scroll through her archives and read at random (try Dogs don’t understand basic concepts like moving) and you will be amused for hours. But that’s because you’re not creative- for me it is research.

Maria Bamford

Somehow I reached my mid-forties without knowing about Maria Bamford. That may have been because I lost touch for almost 10 years with one of my oldest friends in Atlanta. Amy is exactly the type to know about Maria Bamford so it is not surprising that shortly after we reconnected (via Facebook where even crazy old friends can find you if they know how to type) she wanted to share the bounty with me. Her way of indicating that she thought I might find Maria’s humor funny was to post on my FB wall the words MARIA BAMFORD over and over for the maximum status update characters. When I called to gently question her about this (as in “Are you off your meds?”) she said nothing more than “she’s on youtube, she is the funniest damn thing ever and you must watch her right now”. When I pointed out that I was at work and watching youtube was not the same thing as dancing around to the Black Eyed Peas she began yelling “Maria Bamford” over and over until I was forced to hang up. Thanks to the marvel of caller id every time I called her after that she did the same thing.

I have the type of personality that doesn’t respond well to coercion- unless it involves a hot guy, chocolate, or booze- so this shouldn’t have worked but finally IN THE NAME OF RESEARCH I went to youtube and now I too just want to force everyone to watch Maria Bamford- and not just in this year’s Target Christmas commercials which are all right but too short. There are at least 15 episodes of her youtube show so that will hold you for a good hour and half. Then you can start all over again.

I also know why Amy and I both love her- like Allie she is very likely one of these women who seem quite nice, polite, and intelligent but inside are flying a freak flag of epic proportions with a highly skewed quick sense of humor that can leave most people thinking WTF? And like Allie, I’m pretty sure we would be best friends if we ever met.

So, those are two of my go-to creative resources which I have selflessly shared with you and you could now use to become wildly successful while I languish in the minor leagues. If you have a person place or thing you think can stimulate a dried up brain let me know. Unless it's Amy reading this and then I mean it- I am NOT interested in Hoarders!!